A Girl I Know Once Referred To A Toilet As A "Pee Hole"
In what could be the saddest and truest indicator yet that cable programmers have really, really run out of ideas, I was fortunate enough to stumble across a phenomenally stupid show on the Travel Channel, which seems to be a repository for all the crap Discovery Channel just can't bring itself to air.
The show appeared to be a countdown show, the kind of mindless program that spends an hour talking about roller coasters or chocolate factories or something appropriately mild that's best suited for at-home moms, shut-ins, and young children of questionable mental development. This episode announced its intention to count down the 10 best bathrooms in Las Vegas. Bathrooms in Vegas. Bathrooms in Vegas. I can't say it enough. Bathrooms in Vegas.
I only made it to #9 before I blacked out; my roommate found me curled on my floor in a pool of my own blood and urine. But before I lost consciousness, I witnessed the show's breathless accolades for a Star Trek-themed crapper at the Hilton. The narrator, who must surely hate himself, exhorted viewers to "Set their phasers to urinate!" No lie.
It was the greatest thing I've ever seen.
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